Sherman Alexie’s National Book Award–winning The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian has been pulled from the PS 114 sixth-grade reading list based on the following: “And if God hadn’t wanted us to masturbate, then God wouldn’t have given us thumbs. So I thank God for my thumbs.”

Speaking of the National Book Awards: the gotcha!stunt is as old as time. In the 1970s, a disgruntled writer submitted the manuscript of Jerzy Kosiński’s award-winning Steps(sans famous author name) to publishers and, yep, it was rejected.

Did Shakespeare really invent the concept of zero?

“Nestling in the middle of my Jane Austen goody bag is a black lace thong.” A visit to the JASNA convention, the Comic Con of Janeites. 

And a list of well-read TV characters begins with the dog Wishbone, from Wishbone. Happy Monday!